Patiently and Confidently

February 5, 2018 / lauranell / Leave a comment

The conspicuously loud crunch of the cracker snapped me back to attention. I’d been absorbed in the lyrics I was singing, although I hardly had to think about them – that’s how familiar these songs have become. With the lights dimmed, I felt my husband James’ hand press lightly against the small of my back as we walked down the aisle toward the station where communion was set up.

“Oh! precious is the flow that makes me white as snow. No other fount I know, nothing but the blood of Jesus.”

I sang these words quietly as we moved forward in the line, this weekly ritual so familiar that it was almost rote. In the darkness, I reached for a piece of broken cracker and dipped it in the little metal bowl filled with grape juice. As I lifted the cracker to my lips, I saw it was a bit larger than I expected and not quite saturated with juice, so instead of being soft and nearly dissolving on my tongue, the cracker snapped and crunched under my teeth. Continue reading →

Humility: The Prerequisite to Grace

December 30, 2014January 8, 2015 / lauranell / 4 Comments

God is a master storyteller. He knows exactly how to craft our days and shape our world so that we’re reminded of him and his beautiful truths. I’ll often find that he’s been weaving a theme through my life over a period of days – like a gifted writer, subtly infusing the pages of a book with a powerful and lasting message.

In my devotionals, Sunday sermons, words from friends, advice from my mom, my personal prayer life, and so on, God faithfully repeats the message I need to hear or the lesson I need to learn (or re-learn). And because He does it with such beautiful artistry, I can’t help but stand in awe of the truth He’s unfolding in front of my eyes…even when those truths are hard-hitting,

In the past few weeks, he’s been painting a portrait of humility and grace, showing me how the two work in perfect harmony like light and shadow in masterful oil painting. Now, one of those on its own would have been enough to chew on for a while – I mean, humility? Come on, that’s a tough, and often painful, lesson to learn. But God gave me the one-two punch of a lesson in humility and grace. And I’m so glad he did, because what I’ve found is that the two cannot be separated. Continue reading →

Not Paper-Thin or Pain-Free: Embracing Pain in a Healthy Way

November 17, 2014July 25, 2015 / lauranell / 5 Comments

I am thin-skinned. An easily-bruising peach with a low tolerance for pain. As my family would say, I am a “delicate flower” – small things can upset the fragile ecosystem that is me. I wish I could say my paper-thin nature is limited to my literal dermatology, but it goes deeper than that – down into my heart and soul. An unkind word, a bad piece of news, or an unmet expectation has the potential to shake me more than I’d like to admit.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed a bit of a thicker skin – figuratively speaking, of course. I no longer cry when I get a wrinkle in my socks; although, if I’m being honest, that still bugs me. Like most people, my M.O. is to avoid pain and seek out comfort whenever possible. As a highly sensitive person, I experience my circumstances acutely. My surroundings, my feelings, and other people’s feelings affect me deeply. This is why I don’t watch the news, why I’m more prone to anxiety, and why you’ll never catch me watching a violent movie. Continue reading →